The perils of Facebook interest groups

Just awhile ago, on a babywearing Facebook group, a mummy posted that her husband was angry with her for buying another Tula. It made her scared. As the story unfolded and people jumped in with ideas and suggestions, it came out that they owed credit card bills (it’s her husband’s debts not hers) for months. She bought a Tula. And she is extremely reluctant to sell the other Tulas she own to offset the one she just purchased.

Addiction? Peer pressure? I don’t know.

In all these Facebook interest groups, whether it is babywearing or Ju-ju-be or Daiso, it becomes easy to get carried away and think that it is “normal” to have excess… and after awhile the price tag becomes just a number you are immuned to.

I am very guilty of it.

I see people posting stash shots. I want to have a stash like that too! And being a person prone to excesses (remember my wall-to-wall, floor-to-ceiling cabinet for shoes), I did definitely build my own stashes.

The scary thing about these Facebook groups is that when an item goes up for sale on the BST (Buy Sell Trade) pages, people almost immediately reply with “PM!” and that makes you freak out and anyhow PM the next seller in case you miss out that “good deal” or “hard to find design”.

I am guilty as charged. The only  consolation is, I’m not eating into money meant for necessities, and I have the next paycheck coming again.

When the mama made that post anit really saddened me..why would owning the next tula take higher priority than getting the family out of debt which is obviously causing some sort of stress to the husband? We have let something good like babywearing become that evil thing that drives a wedge between husband and wife.

I have shared all the merits of babywearing and using SSCs all this while.  Today, I feel that we need to go back to why we babywear. It is a tool for bonding with baby; an aid for tired arms and restless babies. However, the most important thing a baby needs is not a branded carrier. It is LOVE and a happy family will provide that love, not material needs.

I am happy that while we are not filthy rich, we are not lacking financially. I’m grateful that my husband while not entirely indulgent,  has never seen a need to get upset over my spending habits. He just sporadically reminds me whenever it gets too out of hand.

I hope that the mama, and anyone else in the same situation out there will make the right choices eventually.

Don’t get swept away by the craze online.

My baby’s musical journey

Since 3.5 mths old, we have been bringing Little Foot for music classes every Sunday, and it was only last Sunday that we realised that unknowingly, babies have come and gone in the programme, but we have continued till now, and are in our fourth term with the school,  Musikal Genesis.

When we first started, she was the youngest baby enrolled for that class, and she couldn’t even flip over yet! Today at 10months, she eagerly waves and flaps her hands along to the music, especially the Hello song, and now tries to crawl away for some adventure in the classroom (yes, she’s a bit of a showoff sometimes!)

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Like many first-time parents, and having taken extended leave, I started out with an eagerness to bring her to try out classes and activities that will help in her development, with the caveat that we will only do what does not make her feel burdened/stressed.

We settled for Musikal Genesis after trying another well-known music school at Tanglin Mall. Between the two trials I did, I decided on Musikal Genesis because a) we didn’t feel out of place, unlike at the other school where it was all expat wives and their babies, b) being along Balestier, it was more accessible to us, while I had the trauma of having to hike to a bus stop because there was a long queue for taxis at Tanglin Mall, and c) most importantly, this teacher knew what she was doing and Little Foot took to her almost immediately!

The 45-min programme is filled with a lot of activities aimed to help the little ones develop recognition for rhythms, beats, tunes, fast/slow tempo, loud/soft music. Each term has a different theme. There will always be one or two of the music used for massaging baby in class. There’s also always a “quiet time” halfway through the class, so it teaches baby the signal (song) to wind down and rest a little. Activities becomes a fun workout (mostly for parents who will be hopping, running, swaying, tiptoeing around the classes while carrying the little one), and other activities to help with baby’s psychomotor skills development.

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Sensory experience with flowers!

I like that because the classes are not too big, they allow both papa and mama to be in class. This is especially precious bonding time for Papa Long and Little Foot as she sees very little of him on weekdays.

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Papa Long gets a workout

Every time new parents turn up with their kids for trial, inevitably, they will turn to us and asked us how it has helped Little Foot. I usually tell them it’s fun time for us, so we keep coming back, but the most important thing was that the music, when we sing and play it at home, she would calm down. I have sang some of the massage songs for her while I rocked her to sleep on trying nights, I have walked up and down the corridor outside my flat humming the songs with her in the carrier during those trying days without help and she would calm down and take a nap. She would always quieten down, pause and listen. As she progressed, she would wave and smile when we sing/playback the songs she recognised. We have spent a lot of times singing “Old Macdonalds had a farm” (from the 2nd term) while I try to drive a screaming baby home in the car without going mad…. obviously the music helped me as much as it did her.

So now that we are halfway into the fourth term and already paid for a fifth term, it is timely to write about our experience before it gets hazy in my memories. I’m glad that of all the things, we chose a music programme for her. Maybe mummy was trying to fulfill her music dreams through Little Foot, so I tended to lean towards the music programmes.

I can’t compare with other programmes since we settled for Musikal Genesis pretty quickly, but I can say is that the teacher, Elize, is very good with babies (having 3 of her own), and you can tell she genuinely loves being around the babies. At the same time, the classes are well-planned so that the 45 minutes is maximised. Every term comes with a kit with a book, a CD, a toy and a set of pin-ups, so you have ample tools to practice at home. So it doesn’t end after 45-mins. With me at home, we’ve definitely maximised these. I think this has been money well-spent, and I think Daddy would agree too.

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All the toys available for biting in class

 One day, we will outgrow the Kindermusik Village classes just like how some of her classmates have, but for now, we are still happy to carry her to the class each week. This weekend onwards, the class will be shifting to a Saturday slot, I hope it means she will meet more baby friends!

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contents of the kits collected over four terms

*This is not a sponsored post*

That hoarder in me

Little Foot is growing so fast, some days it does feel like I’m catching my breath just catching up with her.

This month she grew her first tooth, and a second is popping out anytime.

She’s also figured out that the walker doesn’t restrain her… it liberates her. So much so, she can run screaming into the kitchen or do a 3 – point turn and go back down our narrow hallway. This means she’s frowning when we place her in the exersaucer,  her once upon a time most exciting toy.

We’ve also upgraded her to the Standard size Kinderpack, which means her first and most loved KP is going to be redundant soon.

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In the infant size Kinderpack at 3 months young.

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Nicely fitting a standard size Kinderpack now.

Over the weekend, we got her a proper baby chair and a bigger carseat too. So it’s goodbye maxi cosi and Bumbo.

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Chubby Little Foot during her first try of the Bumbo.

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Having a meal in the Bumbo last week (her thighs kept getting stuck when we carried her out)

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Ready for meals now in her high chair.

Mummy doesn’t want time to zip by. I’ve kept so many momentos of her since birth. …from the first romper booties and mittens to her first shoes…even milk bottles. Even the first lock of hair I snipped.

Now as she starts outgrowing her toys and baby gear,  I’m so torn. I feel this great sense of sorrow as I put her in the exersaucer and wonder if it would be her last ride in it. I don’t want to dismantle the toy… I want Little Foot to be that same excited baby with the gummy smile playing in it. At most, the hoarder in me wants to stash it in the storeroom, not sell it on Carousell.

As she progresses along the milestone charts,  no one feels more accomplished than me, having stayed at home to journey this far together with her. Yet whenever it is time to wave goodbye to an old toy or clothes she has outgrown, I find myself an emotional wreck.

I want to hold on to all these… the things and the precious precious memories they carry, but we know space is a luxury in our tiny flat.

Let me just stall for time. Just let’s use it  all a little while more…. *sniffles*

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Still remember the first time she sat in the exersaucer, we had to add pillows to make sure she wasn’t floundering in it.

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Now, from botak head to a head full of hair.

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Zippin’ up and down in the baby walker.

“Maaa…”

Little Foot has been sleeping since slightly after 8pm , waking occasionally as usual to latch (mostly for comfort).

Awhile ago, in the wee hours, she woke up, flipped around and went back to sleep. And then she let out a clear “Maaa…” in a contented gentle voice and a smile on her face, still asleep.

I just experienced bliss like no words can describe. Glad you are dreaming sweet dreams of me tonight baby.

Love you, Little Foot. Sleep tight 🙂

Lessons from being home alone with Little Foot

I unexpectedly spent three weeks at home with Little Foot without our helper who went on home leave,  and this gave me a lot of food for thought (although no bandwidth to pen them).

What I learned in my short term of being a SAHM without help really prompted me to write this to give my permanent SAHM friends a pat on the back.

1. Forget Hollywood and the Duchess
You know those photos of all those Hollywood stars like Angelina Jolie and our dear Princess Catherine spotted by Paparazzi all glam and chic and in control? Forget it. I didn’t even find time to style my hair (no way, you said?). Some days I’m looking half-mad/half – asleep walking up and down the corridor outside our unit rocking Little Foot incessantly in a carrier.

2. No one dies because the house is messy

I don’t understand the whole rationale behind why my helper rolls up the playmat (which weighs a bloody tonne!) everyday, sometimes more than once. Maybe over the years my mum has really drummed in the whole idea of how there must be a semblance of neatness (so all mess are hidden). I was happy to leave the mat and toys there. We go for a nap or a walk, we come back and I plonk Little Foot down on it. Afterall, the safest place is the floor now that she is quite a crawler and roller! Dealing with a baby who has separation anxiety, needs to be bathed, fed and entertained while my back killed me and I also need to eat and drink to stay alive and provide milk already made me feel like I need to clone myself. So please,  never judge a mama whose house is messy.  Rather use the make sure you didn’t feed your child a shoe and make her wear her cereal than try to pack toys which she will unpack in a blink.  Just prioritise.

3. It takes a village to raise a child.

I know it sounds cliché. It’s not. It’s a fact of life. In the second week as my back and stomach pangs deteriorated, and I start needing to catch my breath just washing a sippy cup, my siblings and mother, in addition to Daddy Long threw me a lot of lifelines. They checked on me via Whatsapp and calls. My bro-in-law and popped by to just help me carry Little Foot for awhile the one day I was afraid I wasn’t going to be ok, and my younger sister popped by to help out the next day. Daddy Long took many pockets of leave to chip in too. The best was my mum who took leave to accompany me and even cleaned and cooked.

4. It is okay to ask for help.

At first I was all fine and dandy, so the first week was all cosy rosy and Little Foot and I had a lot of fun bonding. Then as my back worsened and I started to worry (with scary images of me collapsed somewhere while my helpless baby crawled around and bawled her eyes out) about us being home alone, it took a lot for me to open my mouth and ask for help beyond the husband.

I beat myself up about it. All the “other mummies have been doing it, why I am so cannot make it?” self-reproaches playback in my head. On repeat mode.

And then I had to admit to myself I am not them. I have medical issues. I cannot be superwoman. And so I asked  and it wasn’t so bad. I love my family and we are very close. Isn’t that why mummies want more than one kid? So you can lean on each other?  I asked and they rose to the occasion as they always have for me.

5. Never let others decide how to deal with your child.

Three weeks I spent with my temperamental girl. I asked myself what went wrong.

I blame myself first… I carried her too much from birth (stupid colic!) And I continued to indulge her even after the colic had gone away. I also allowed my helper to respond faster than The Flash whenever Little Foot so much as squeaked, and I didn’t think all the chattering to her was wrong. The result? My 9 month old doesn’t know how to self- soothe or self-entertain,   fear separation and fear pockets of silence. Now this meant I have to talk to her, sing to her, and make eye contact ALL THE TIME. (Someone pass me the Woodbridge admission form please).

So in these three weeks,  we practised delayed gratification (Daddy is more firm on that one while I cave in a lot more). I made sure there was quiet time (it’s ok to let her sit and bite her toys while I stone and space out beside her), More importantly, I made sure of MEANINGFUL interaction. I pose questions to her like “What’s that sound?” And I provide replies and explanations about things “oh you hear that thunder? It’s going to rain! Rain is good as we all need water to drink…plants can grow, and then provide us with oxygen…” . We read books, and I sing her nursery rhymes and songs. I also spoke to her like a friend about my feelings. Some days she sat there wide-eyed and quiet when I felt down and emo. Yes, babies do feel and connect with mummies like that.

6. Things don’t always turn out the way we plan.

Never mind Plan A didn’t work.. Plan B, Plan C fails too. That is motherhood. It’s like how I attempted to bring Little Foot out for a walk more than twice. That day she spent pushing hard stools out the whole day…Each time we were supposedly ready, she would suddenly need to push something out. Crap… All plans are put of the window!

I think this applies to the current care giving arrangements too. Just need to keep adapting.

7. Mummies,  we push ourselves too hard.

I babywear Little Foot a lot. Too much.
I lose good sleep because we co-sleep and she wakes for milk a lot.
I spend her nap times thinking of her diet (what food to intro next) and how to make her bowel movements smoother… or what educational toys or baby gear to buy next.

Still not enough. And then I unconsciously compare with the other mummies who look like they are doing fine. And want to do more. So I guess I deserve to have my brought on my  lower back pain (old injuries plus a curved spine that too epidural), gastric pain and breathing issues.

At times, I need to check myself on the self-reproaches and just sing “Let It Go”…. play boo boo saliva with Little Foot and just giggle mindlessly with her.

8. Don’t belittle Daddy’s role.

Without Daddy Long, I would have gone off the rails on my downward spirals. Without Daddy Long and all the leave he took to help out, I cannot imagine how life would be when I cannot do so many things and really just want to lie down and rest inside of hang the laundry. He gave me a lot of extra time to sleep by bringing our little girl our for walks. And still had to endure my nitpicking, and listen to my fears (and my last words when I get all melodramatic).

My list could go on.

Motherhood is always a work in progress. See, 34 years on, my own mum finds it her responsibility to come and babysit me and my baby. I know she lost sleep worrying about me again. Not a vocation for the faint – hearted.

So, to my full time SAHM friends who have been coping alone, I don’t know how you do it, but you have my respect. Now that our dear helper is back, I can go back to my sane tai-tai sort of SAHM life again, but it won’t be the same anymore, because I now need to make sure the bad habits are kicked before I go back to work in 1.5 months’ time.  And oops…we both have greater separation anxiety now after having only each other to cling onto for so long.

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Unconditionally

“Love is unconditional”.

In my youth,  I hear this A LOT from people around me. Movies and drama tout this… youngsters in puppy love want to find someone who love unconditionally.

I tell you, that “unconditional” state can only be achieved in a parent-child situation.

Think.  Would you put your nose to your  boyfriend’s ass to check if he took a crap? Would you wake up 10 times a night because your boyfriend is hungry/feeling cranky/need to go to the loo?

Motherhood makes me tired like a zombie, yet unable to sleep sometimes because I’m afraid she might wander off the bed if I KO. Motherhood makes me ready to take the hit if we should both fall and doing my best to prevent that fall from even happening in the first place… in essence, motherhood shifted my priority from me to her.

So to all the young girls out there…. (I was there once, a long time ago). Someone already loves you unconditionally. it’s the one who changed your diapers, fed you, protected you when you were a helpless little one. And with that confidence,  go ride a rainbow, chase your dreams, soar like an eagle. That’s when you will attract a partner who wants to take up the challenge of loving you more than your parents can.

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Little Foot with Papa Long on Sunday.

That two loud thuds that cracked my heart

This morning at 34 Weeks and 1 Day, Little Foot fell off the bed. Thankfully she landed in a fortunate spot. Still, we wish we were more fortunate.

The mister had decided to place her beside me for morning feed and had gone to the living room to get his breather.

[Note — my brain never functions well between 6am to 930 am. That’s the time I’m dead to the world after pockets of night feeds.]

Apparently, she had gotten her feed, but she got bored and decided to explore the new-found side of the world. Only a few days ago, she finally figured out how to roll to her right. My guess is she was reaching for the much coveted aircon remote and the even more coveted handphones on that side table. So she fell off. Two loud thuds (probably something hit the side table first) woke me up and my heart cracked. I screamed and retrieved her. Luckily she landed on her Daddy’s big buckwheat pillow on the Totoro futon that he’s been camping on.

She cried for about a minute, latched for comfort and then moved on. How nice that babies can forgive easily. I was left pondering why it happened, why no one placed a bolster there. And I spent the day searching for a bump or looking out for any signs that she might be hurt more than we realised.

Well, here’s her at music class today.

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Completely energetic. And feisty as usual. She even mastered arms out in carrier today, and found a new fetish for the texture and sound of plastic bags. So we can safely say she’s feeling good.

I guess this marks the start of Little Foot’s Adventures around the house and into the world…. and a signal to really try to finish babyproofing the place asap.

Daddy as usual could still say jokingly that we should make her a milestone card that says “Today I rolled off the bed for the first time”.

At times like this, I know whether to laugh or cry. May be easier to strangle him and make him a milestone card for it too. Hmmph!

My obssessions with baby carriers

I’m starting to earn quite a rep among my mummy friends (and I’m not sure it’s a good thing really), for having this obsession with babywearing. Overall, of all the different modes of babywearing, my personal preference is to use a carrier. (Babywearers refer to them as soft-structured carriers (SSCs)). Since I’ve had quite a few people ask me how I felt about them, I thought it’d be nice to pen my thoughts down, especially as each mode of carrying and each wrap and carrier added their own little fond memories to my memory bank of Little Foot’s journey.

Ring Sling

My babywearing stash started humbly with the purchase of a second-hand The Birth Shop ring sling. I was intending to buy a nursing pillow from this mama, but since she had a $10 good deal on the ring sling, I got it too, with the encouragement of my supermummy sister (she’s a mother of three). This ring sling, I only ever tried twice, and like many amateurs, I cradle carried Little Foot in it (a big no no according to the babywearing police). I didn’t use it again after one outing in it, since both Little Foot and I were not really comfortable. A ring sling works for many and is supposed to be fast in, fast out for the baby, but it didn’t work for me because I have a lower back issue and still recovering slowly from the epidural. Worse, I kept thinking she was going to fall out, and spent most of the time cradling her with the ring sling in my arms. I might as well have removed the cloth.

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Here’s me trying the ring sling while in confinement. Then, I was not aware that cradle carry posed certain dangers to babies.

K’tan Wrap Carrier (I call it the cheater’s wrap)

As we inched towards third trimester, I remembered a church friend always carrying her little one so snugly while she attended Sunday Mass, and I wanted that kind of closeness with my baby girl. So I did a little bit of research online and came across the Baby K’tan Carrier. I wanted to wrap, but did not want the complications of wrapping (Ok, I’m lazy). The K’tan was the answer. With luck, the only online store (Nursing Muslimah) that brought this into Singapore from US was taking pre-orders and it arrived just before Little Foot was born. The K’tan became a very special piece to me. I still remember that warm and fuzzy feeling I had when I first used it to carry Little Foot to the polyclinic for her jaundice tests. She was a few days old, and looked so adorable wearing the matching  little hat, mittens, and romper from Carters. Thinking of that moment still brings a lump to my throat. She was so small, and I wanted to protect her from the world. The K’tan helped me do that. It was like she was back in my tummy again as she snuggled against my chest.

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20141215_150629 Carrying fragile little baby to the Polyclinic in the K’tan. She was only a few days old.

So far, I have tried two different ways of carrying Little Foot in it. It is our special piece, and comes with a lot of sleepy dust for her during her early days. I like that it is designed to be sort of a idiot proof version of a wrap and is poppable. I can take baby in and out easily, and there isn’t a lot of cloth to deal with while we’re out. I also like that the material is so soft and airy (I got the K’tan Breeze).

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I like how discreet and understated the K’tan is. At one glance, it looked like a normal blouse I would wear.

Soft-structured Carriers (my current craze)

We bought the Baby Bjorn One from Amazon during Black Friday sale also before I delivered. At my insistence, Long purchased it, and he is now an ardent fan of it. He calls it “his carrier”, which means he uses it exclusively while he tries very hard to reject my offers to wear the other carriers which I use. I used it twice, and my verdict it that it was designed for bigger and taller folks, hence the men love it. It carries too low for me and is too loose, even when tightened all the way. While this version of the Bjorn has ironed out the issue of the earlier version with narrow seat which babywearers and doctors claim can can cause hip dysplasia, this one continued to allow front-facing (again I hear growls from the babywearing police). Infants are not meant to front-face as it strains the baby’s spine which is in a C shape prior to them learning how to sit up, stand and walk, which they then start developing the S shape. I have no issue with Long using it, but I have warned him not to attempt to front-face our baby. Not yet. He can try it when she’s a toddler. Plus point of this carrier is the mesh material, which is lightweight and airy. It’s also relatively easy to wear and put baby in. Long especially loves the colour. Silver, which we decided to get instead of the boring black.

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20150119_113129 One of the two times I wore the Bjorn One.

Somewhere in my stash is also an Ergobaby Original, which is a handmedown from my supermummy sister. Unfortunately, at 3 mth old, we have not been able to get into it successfully. Without an infant insert, which will be too much to bear for our sweaty baby, I tried the towel insert, which is a hack that YouTube taught. After two attempts, each with loud, angry crying from Little Foot, we gave up. So I have no verdict on the Ergo, but IMHO, I feel mummies should not try that towel hack. I noted the panel’s quite big, which means your baby could shift around in the carrier and there’s lack of support for the spine. Remember the baby’s spine is still very fragile, and I prefer zero risks when it comes to my only child. So I’m returning it without trying it.

With an emergency visit to Baby Slings and Carriers prior to our helper going on urgent home leave, I got the Boba 4G carrier and the Je’ porte Mon Bebe stretchy wrap.

At this stage, Little Foot was in her colicky stage and I needed something for my sanity while I cared for her alone (bearing in mind my bad back). I tried the Manduca and the Cat Bird Baby there, but Little Foot didn’t cry in the Boba 4G carrier so I got that. It came highly recommended by another Dec mummy, and she sure was right. This became the next sleepy dust carrier for Little Foot after the K’tan. I remember that one evening she refused to nap, refused to lay down, I put her into the carrier and we took a walk downstairs. We even sat on the swing at the nearby playground. I was an emotional wreck that evening with a baby who didn’t want to sleep… so there, me with baby in carrier and Long on the other swing, I managed to voice out my frustrations, my worries, and let off steam. And she slept soundly. It brought a lot of relief to me, and I loved how she would peep out from under the hood whenever I used it to shield her from the sun and the winds. I also like the neat little pocket at the waist band, that I could put an atm card and a few dollar notes in it. It was the carrier that I used that week of no help, so I could go get my lunch at the coffeeshop / market. And it was the only carrier which I could extract Little Foot without waking her up (upside-down turtle style).

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Lotsa happy sleepy moments with the Boba 4G… I always felt it saved my sanity at the peak of the colic attacks.

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As I was reading about Tulas and other more atas carriers than those you usually see at baby fairs and Mothercare, I chanced upon some forum thread mentioning the Kinderpack (KP) being the solution for those who wanted something even better than the Tula (in my mind I was like if the Tula was like the Prada of SSCs, then what would this be??). When I wanted to buy it I was stumped. Why is it not sold anywhere? It took weeks of reading after joining the Kinderpack Chatter and BST Facebook group, to learn quickly that the demand greatly outweighed the supply for good reason. There was so much rave reviews about it, the prints were so good looking, and Kindercarry only had four people sewing these. I was sucked into it. I had to get my hands on one. I tried getting one on stocking days (failed in four attempts so far, overslept for some of the stocking days). I PMed several sellers who listed FSOs or FSOTs without success, when those I wanted in the right size (infant/standard) were listed, they were either too expensive (going sometimes at more than double the retail value of $179USD), or they were gone in a flash. Finally I had some luck with one that was not sky-high price and in a print I loved. The lady in US got my PM within minutes of posting. And in the next hour, I had accepted her paypal invoice and paid for it. Then I waited and waited… just as I was about to resigned to the idea that Stinkpost or whoever was handling my priority first class airmail may have swallowed my beloved KP, my mailbox was stuffed with a fat parcel so full I had problems pulling it out of my letter box. It was love! Little Foot loved being carried in this, to the point she has since frowned on the Boba (her legs are currently too long to “squat” position in the Boba, but too short to dangle out comfortably for the M shape). And she looked so cute in it, we had a lot of “Aww…she so small…she so cute!” at Sentosa during our staycation. As many KP fans testified, it was the carrier I can carry her for hours without feeling like my back was numb or going to break into two. No shoulder aches either. The only downside is that there’s no pocket for money or cards. So I carried a small sling with it. Today, we still continue to use this when we go out… and I convinced Long to try it last week too. I’m so in love with the prints and the comfort that I’ve just landed another one in standard/standard of the bst page, just coz it’s in a print that I super love. Looking forward to seeing my mailbox stuffed again.

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I actually have a Tula (in cute rockets design!) that I bought on impulse. It happened the first time I failed to score a KP, and I was like, “Ok, Tula’s got that print, I’ll just get that. Take that Kindercarry!”. People don’t really think very straight at 2.30am especially after being chronically lack of sleep for a couple of months. It’s still hidden in my wardrobe. I will give a verdict on it when Little Foot becomes big enough to fit in it. It requires an infant insert for younger babies, and nope, not going to try that in this weather. The husband is going to choke when he sees it.

Woven Wraps

The Je’ porte Mon Bebe  Stretchy Wrap, was an accidental find. The salesguy at Baby Slings and Carriers offered to let me try it although I had already tried 3 SSCs, and it was so bouncy and comfy, and much easier to wrap then I expected. So I got it. Had some successful and some not-so-successful wrapping sessions with this one. That week of no help, I used it to carry her to KKH for her physio session. She hardly made a fuss and slept in it after the physio. I like that it was poppable. I could pull her out and put her back without retying. That was the occasion she slept while I had dinner with my mum and I dropped teriyaki sauce on her head (oops!). There were evenings that I tried wrapping her in it while she was fussing, and failed. One of the downsides of this wrap is the material. in order to hold the weight and stretch, it was thick, and hence little too hot for comfort. Everytime after use, both of us would have out tees soaked through. And it can only hold up to 14kg, so the lifespan would be shorter than woven wraps and most SSCs.

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After trying the stretchy wrap, I became more open to the idea of wrapping. The amount of beautiful (and some seriously expensive) woven wraps on Babywearing Singapore and it’s sister Swap and Library Facebook pages were constantly tempting me to try wrapping out. So I did.

In one week, I bought 3 woven wraps, all preloved in excellent condition from very friendly mamas on the SG Babywearing Swap & Library (enter at your own risk!).

  • Vatanai Unalaska Sz 4 – This attracted me with its whales and reminded me of the sun, sand and sea I loved so much and missed dearly.
  • Cloth of Kin ‘Happy’ Sz 5 – I read a little about handwoven wraps, awesome but exorbitant. So when this was posted at a good price, I jumped. This was the only cloth I bought in my base size (Size 5), and I used when I took a consultation session on wrapping with Nurjanna from Jars of Fluff (had a great consultation session with her, and learned Front Wrap Cross Carry (FWCC) and Ring Slinging from her).
  • Didymos Indio Aurora Sz 4 – I fell in love with the colours of this cloth when I first saw it online. Took awhile stalking “for sale” posts before I finally got this one. I do wish it was a Size 5 though.
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My one and only attempt to wrap Little Foot (this is the Cloth of Kin)

My take…

For the love of our babies, we babywear.

We want to have that skin-to-skin and a lot of contact with them. It helps them emotionally, it supposedly helps colicky babies too. My search for a carrier stemmed first from the desire and promise to be close to my Little Foot when she arrived in this world. Later on, it evolved into our quest for a way to soothe her and get her to sleep as she started having colic and reflux, and absolutely refused to be put down for long hours. My back was hurting, my arms were aching and babywearing was a solution for me.

When I tried carriers at the brick & mortar shops, if she wailed even after I had walked around for awhile, I put that carrier back. If she couldn’t settle down in it, it’s not suitable for us, even if it didn’t hurt my back, or even if it came with a hefty price tag. The only risk I took was the KP, and luckily that paid off.

As for wrapping, I am still in two minds about it. Lazy I am, and Little Foot has no patience most days. I don’t get much encouragement whenever I attempt to do FWCC. It just looked so troublesome to the people around me. We’ll probably give it a few more tries, but deep down, I’m quite happy to stick to the SSCs. It would saves me spending hundreds of dollars on cloths (which I still can’t quite accept).

Babywearing is really a very personal decision, and what suits you may not suit me, and vice versa. All that matters is having a happy and safe baby while providing some sanity to mummy and daddy. Of course, some, like Long will feel that having one carrier will do, but he’s the guy with only 1 pair of working shoes (and 1 spare for rainy days), while I’m the one with the floor-to-ceiling, wall-to-wall cabinet of shoes. I guess I’m prone to excesses when it comes to some things. This babywearing period won’t last forever, and I’m going to just enjoy every chance I get.

And yes, the husband is going to continue to accuse me of baby-hogging 😉

Afternote: I have another Kinderpack, one Kokadi Flip carrier, two more Tula carriers, one Lenny Lamb carrier and a Kokadi wrap enroute from various parts of the world to my mailbox. Now, which of my Ferragamo shoes to sell, or should I sell a bag or two, to fund this obsession?